Rules. They need to be set and understood.

Coming on too strong. We are all guilty of it. Sometimes, well most times, at least for me, it is alcohol induced. Sometimes I just get excited over shit and don't even realize what I'm doing. And it's the same with other people. So I am here to address some things and lay some groundwork. We've already discussed internet dating (go back and read if you haven't you non subscribing son of a bitch), I won't get too heavily into that again.

The first rule, that no one understands anymore, is phone etiquette. It is easy to understand male phone etiquette. We use the phone as little as possible. Some of you call it mean, I call it efficient. We can figure out plans and have everything setup for the night in a 30 second call to a guy friend. No need to waste away a half hour discussing things that can be brought up in person, or just aren't important at that time. But when a guy does get weird on the phone, is when he gets a phone number from a lady. 24 hours, 48 hours? What are the rules? It applies differently to certain people, and I would have to say the only guideline is the situation itself and how it works itself out. Expectations need to be set for this to be better laid out. For example- let's take a crazy one. You meet a girl at a bar and go back to your place and have sex all night and she leaves in the morning but gives you her phone number. Okay, seems like you were a buckin bronco then buddy, call her later that evening, but just to say you had a lot of fun and you want to do it again (if you mean it, otherwise you're a typical asshole). If it's like a Wednesday, wait until Friday, she will be more anxious, obviously that's what you want.
Example 2- you're an AIM playaaaaaaaa- you get a girl's number you've been talking to for anywhere from 12 seconds to 32 months. How long do you wait then? COMPLETELY depends on the situation. First off, she may have given you the number to the reject line. Do a google search on the number and see if it comes up- (in my defense I only did it once because it seemed too good to be true) No hits? You're in luck, she might dig ya. But does she talk about other boys or how much she hates men and seriously, SERIOUSLY, just wants someone to talk to? Give it time then buddy, you aren't getting head, by any means. Unless you are that good. But if you are, you wouldn't need someone else to tell you how to roll with it all.

On the flipside, the women need to understand what's up as well. Guys may seem to come on too strong but, sometimes it is your own fault. Maybe you just had an amazing conversation and he took it the wrong way. Or maybe you were flirting more than you realized? It's possible, I SEEN IT. Maybe he read about your nonverbal clues in some men's magazine and thinks he has you pegged. Either way, don't always blame him. Poor guy, maybe he hasn't touched a woman in like 3 months and is getting sick of calloused, hairy hands and fading eyesight. We can be overeager, but that's more reason for everyone to set expectations before the awkwardness even has a chance to set in. That's the main mixup here, women assume we know when they want to be called, and men assume the women want the call as soon as possible (which can be true, yet rare. and if she's that desperate, she can give up the TRADITIONAL, bullshit gender role we play, and make the first move) On that note, how come everything is changing but that which some call "old fashioned"? Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with holding the doors for women, opening her car door first, all that cute stuff, thats chivalry. But the whole deal about who is supposed to call whom first, making the first move, yadda yadda, cmon! If I can have a female boss, I can have a female throw me on the bed and start making out with me. And if I could have those two together, I would probably climb the corporate ladder quicker than kissing an old white man's ass.

So what are the rules? To review- set expectations, always. That way there are no surprises when it comes to contact attempts. Don't overdo it. An example? Too much text messaging. I'm lucky, it costs me money so I never spend it. But too much calling, too much texting, is unnecessary. If the other person doesn't respond to the text, or is responding with one word answers, give up.... and as for calling? No more in one day unless the other party asks you to- if EVEN once a day.

I like an assertive woman- take charge, tell me how it's going to go. That's hot. What a random change in subjects.



PS- for credit, this was inspired by some crazy girl, I think her name is Amelia, well her Myspace name is, but that means her real name is probably Gertrude or something and she is being trendy. Anywho, she made my banner too, how hot. Ask Zandar, yo.