Why I should write for Men's Health

So the new issue came a few weeks ago, I finally got around to reading it. Not only is there an article in there on ways to turn a woman on other than direct genital contact, there is an article on how to now blow it with her friends (ie, cockblockers r us). There is also a fun fact I thought I would dive into and address. Seems that married men are the happiest of men surveyed, with single men being the least happy. I guess at some point in life, sex no longer equates happiness. Boy do I hope I never reach that phase.

So why would men be happier in relationships- let's take a look. One, we don't bitch to our guy friends. Not about everyday things. We need someone to listen to our shit about work, our shit about family, things we just aren't normally going to approach other guy friends about. So women, being in a relationship with you, allows us to pile our shit on you and feel better because of it. Thank you.

In the beginning of a relationship, there is plenty of sex. Sex makes everyone happy, so that makes sense too, does it not? So the marriage part threw me off. Maybe it is because you are finally getting everything done you have wanted: settling down, starting a family, becoming a mere shadow of what you were and growing into what your father one day dreamed you would be. Honestly, to even think about this at my age and where I am in my life, is frightening. Maybe that is also because all of my relationships have wound up terribly short and nightmarish. But hey, that is life isn't it?

So where is this blog going? I don't know. I wanted to write a book initially, this took up too much of my time as of late. I want it to grow, I want more readers. I want loyal readers. I want more feedback, comment, love, affection, and most importantly, hate. I need a banner. Someone help me make a banner. I spend too much time at work and the gym, the rest of my free time is pretty much spent here. Maybe I should hire a secretary. Will anyone work for laughs? Let me know. Because if laughs are payment, you will be making six digits. Reiche isn't picking up the slack. What a bum. I want to be serious about this, hear me now. It is just a matter of getting the word out there- this guy is fucking funny, fucking smart, and what a deadly combination. Nevermind his devilishly good looks.

Should I change my attack here? This has mostly been about my opinions and thoughts. Should I branch out and include stories? Some of you might hate me if I talk about the good ol days. Some of you might love me more. OH, the juxtaposition. But seriously, use that word two times tomorrow and you get a huge prize.

On that note.... back to the drawing board.